Sunday, February 13, 2011

90/10

there are so many influential people in my life - so so many actually, but there is one that i'd like to pay tribute to and thank from the bottom of my heart today, and her name is grandma moj around here :)

 

she is one of the most, if not the most, positive people i know. she is so incredibly happy and has a way of brightening your day like no one else. she has the best sense of humor, and i can't help but smile every time i talk to her on the phone, and i can't help but feel a little better about my day every time i'm with her. one of her favorite sayings is - it's only a good day if you make it a good day - and we have that quote hanging above our doorway to remind us to CHOOSE to be happy like she does. i love it!!! she makes me want to be a better person, and i look up to her more than she'll ever know.


she introduced a concept to me last time we were home, and i want to share it. it's worth the read, i promise. it's from stephen covey, and it's called the 90/10 principle. check it out.....

10% of life is made up of what happens to you. 90% of life is decided by how you react. What does this mean? We really have no control over 10% of what happens to us. We cannot stop the car from breaking down. The plane will be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off. A driver may cut us off in traffic. We have no control over this 10%. The other 90% is different. You determine the other 90%. How? By your reaction.


You are eating breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt. You have no control over what just what happened. What happens when the next will be determined by how you react. You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over. She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your spouse and criticize her for placing the cup too close to the edge of the table. A short verbal battle follows. You storm upstairs and change your shirt Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish breakfast and get ready for school. She misses the bus. Your spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school. Because you are late, you drive 40 miles an hour in a 30 mph speed limit. After a 15-minute delay and throwing $60 traffic fine away, you arrive at school. Your daughter runs into the building without saying goodbye. After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you find you forgot your briefcase. Your day has started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse. You look forward to coming home, When you arrive home, you find small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter. Why? Because of how you reacted in the morning. Why did you have a bad day?

A) Did the coffee cause it?

B) Did your daughter cause it?

C) Did the policeman cause it?

D) Did you cause it?

The answer is "D".


You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day. Here is what could have and should have happened. Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently say," It's ok honey, you just need, to be more careful next time". Grabbing a towel you rush upstairs. After grabbing a new shirt and your briefcase, you come back down in time to look through the window and see your child getting on the bus. She turns and waves. You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff. Your boss comments on how good the day you are having. Notice the difference? Two different scenarios.

Both started the same.

Both ended different.

Why? Because of how you REACTED. You really do not have any control over 10% of what happens. The other 90% was determined by your reaction.


there have been many times that i've repeated "90/10" in my head or out loud to remind myself that it's my reaction that will decide the outcome of various situations, and it really does help! anyway, thank you so much to such an amazing woman, mother in law, friend, and person for teaching me and showing me how to be truly happy. love you grandma moj!

 
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oh and there is another new post under this one with some january fun!

5 comments:

MotherBeck said...

Boy, I really needed this today. Thanks Lynz. You are so lucky to have such a good example in your life.

Tyler and Kristin Smith said...

this is SO fabulous.
I'm writing this one down...

Christal said...

Love this post its so so true! To bad we couldn't all think of that before we react eh! Great post!

Kinsey and Dustin said...

Great message! I don't think any one can hear it enough:)

Marie said...

Great reminder. Right now I have three kids with a very violent form of the stomach flu. The 90/10 principle is good to keep in mind as I wash and wash and wash out sheets, blankets, and pajamas.

Good things about this day:

1. lots of snuggles
2. don't feel the need to rush through a to-do list
3. lots of stories
4. Dirk picked Aimee up from school so I wouldn't have to take the boys out
5. No one cares that I have no plan for supper.